HE HAD IT COMING
IM SO PISSED OFF THAT WE DONT HAVE BALLS ANY MORE
I WANT TO WEAR A HUGE DRESS AND BE COURTED AND DANCE AROUND AND HAVE MY GOWN SWEEP THE FLOOR AND BE ALL ELEGANT AND GRACEFUL WITH GLOVES AND SHIT
BUT NO WE HAVE DUMB HOUSE PARTIES WITH CHEAP BEER AND RED CUPS AND HORNY TEENAGE BOYS WHO PUT THEIR HANDS UP MY SHIRT
i was confused at the word balls in the beginning until i finished it
Well first part applies to me anyway…too old for rest.
pro tip: in a zombie apocalypse, your first stop shouldn’t be a guns shop, it should be a hardware store. not only are they stocked with enough caustic materials and sharp weaponry to make your head spin, they usually also have camping and survival gear as well as food. and most are windowless and easy to defend. just saying.
pro tip 2: Buy the shark mail that divers use. If a shark can’t bite through it, neither can a zombie
ashley tisdale and seth rogen in donnie darko is so funny they are like 12
aren’t you forgetting someone
Titan aka the Mermaid Moon
1. Wear your motherfucking best clothes—it shows the actors that you think their performance is worth dressing up for.
2. Shut the fuck up—Don’t fucking open that hole on your face while the show is taking place.
3. Put your motherfucking cell phone away—that’s fucking rude and I really shouldn’t have to explain why
you guys are worrying me
at least sokka can bend something
he could bend me over
do you ever just hear a certain lyric and your throat feels like it’s closing up bc it hits you that hard
australians dont have sex
I spat out my coffee
sorry about your
remember that first live action scooby doo movie. where the antagonist was literally scrappy doo and he was stealing peoples souls, like actually really stealing and absorbing souls, and was planning on taking scoobys soul to rule the world with an army of demons and get revenge on the gang after they abandoned him because he kept peeing in the car, and near the end he turned into this huge dog monster
a real movie
vagina’s are able to stretch wide enough to give birth to a fucking baby and then return to it’s original size but of course being penetrated by that grass blade you call a penis is what’s going to make it “loose”
Uhh. The baby doesnt come out of where the penis goes in…
so today at work I cleaned this old man’s golf clubs and I thought he was getting his wallet out of his bag but instead he pulls out this giant plastic target bag of yellow plums. he tipped us in yellow plums. he told us not to tell anyone we had these and I looked them up because they were so good and these plums are illegal in the US. I got tipped in illegally imported plums.